Welcome to Divorce | The Final Divide
Texas Divorce Article
This is a selection made from among articles on Texas Divorce. For a permanent link to this article, or to bookmark it for future reading, click here.
"America’s Voiceless” The Children of Divorce
from: Susan Murphy-MilanoWhen people start a new relationship, it is as though Cinderella and her Prince stepped out of that childhood story. A more realistic way to look at it is to think of it as two people who are running for office, campaigning to be in the other person’s life. Forget that it is not who they will be later in life. We are too busy getting the other person to “choose us” so we can live happily ever after. There is, bad habits early on in the relationship we never see. For instance, leaving dirty clothes scattered, drinking directly out of the juice carton, putting a dirty knife back in the drawer and watching from around the corner as they lick it clean, washing is too much effort. Both sides hide their bad habits when they begin dating, because they are too busy running for the highest office in the country, ultimately the office of marriage and parenthood.
This fantasy life fades as people grow together in a relationship. Unfortunately, about sixty percent grow apart during the marriage.
When the marriage ends it is like a house set on fire. All desired hopes, dreams and commitment cherished by both sides, up in smoke. But, we forget that the child of this relationship has yet to lay the foundation of their lives.
Divorce on any level, is devastating. For children, their warm, safe world is suddenly shattered like a broken toy, in many pieces. When parents begin to divorce, do they really stop and think about the children? All too often, the children fall under the invisible heading of “power base” or worse yet, “negotiable”.
A child’s life during a divorce is like a roller coaster, going up minute and down the next. Parents are keeping score of their child’s affection as though they were at a sporting event. Both parents fear losing ground as though their competition, the other parent, chips away at there own individual “power base”. This is an automatic reaction during a divorce. If only parents would stop for a moment and realize, that children have unconditional love for each of them.
Children were not beamed down from space to earth. They were conceived and brought into this world with the greatest expectations, and most of all love. By two people the child calls mother and father. These two people have forgotten that being a parent, role model and teacher, means not putting down the other. Or using the children to emotionally beat up the “competition”. Because, being a parent is a privilege!
A divorce is like a funeral. Of course, there is no casket or service. But the process is the same.
“Funeral” services begin when the parties enter their lawyers office, (I call them legal funeral representatives) they help prepare for the death of their clients marriage.
The lawyers seek out personal, confidential information about you, only to file it in a public record for the world to see.
Attached to this public record filing is a detailed financial description, (yours) of personal property and assets acquired during the marriage.
Somewhere between page 11 or 15 of the divorce agreement, your children are listed, like an asset, by name and age. And on yet another page, you will find the “children”, stating who gets custody when, on what days, with specific times and for how long. Can’t forget the holiday schedules, this appears on yet another page of the divorce decree. This page looks more like a major event schedule, trading odd and even years off during the holidays.
If parents would think for a moment and get off their “power base”, they should be able to work out these very private details among themselves.
Months, and in some cases years later a judge, who I refer to as the coroner (no disrespect intended) sit before these strangers, in a court of law, with people who once vowed to love, honor and cherish each other all the days of their lives, ask if all parties are in agreement, with the tap of his gavel, signs the death certificate (known more commonly as the divorce decree.
I for one think this process is a crime. We allow total strangers to settle our once very happy lives. The greater crime, however, is the children, divided up among the parents like a piece of property. They are the “Voiceless Victims.”
© 2005 - Susan Murphy Milano http://www.movingoutmovingon.com
About the Author
Susan Murphy Milano, is a respected author and nationally recognized relationship expert.Her new book Moving Out,Moving On, when a relationship goes wrong is now available.Susan's quest for justice has been trumpted across the pages of newspapers, magazines, radio and televison, including, Oprah, CNN, MSCNBC, ABC, NBC, 20/20.http://www.movingoutmvoingon.com
Warning: file(http://www.searchfeed.com/rd/feed/TextFeed.jsp?trackID=C0534527057&pID=59827&cat=texas+divorce&nl=5&page=1&excID=) [function.file]: failed to open stream: HTTP request failed! HTTP/1.1 404 Not Found
in /home/aldouspi/public_html/divorce/datas/searchfeed.php on line 8
Texas Divorce Specific links
Texas Divorce News
Kilday Hart: Divorce forms divide two groups of Texas lawyers - Houston Chronicle
Kilday Hart: Divorce forms divide two groups of Texas lawyers Houston Chronicle Kramer, some Texas divorce attorneys are warring with other prominent lawyers, the members of the Texas Access to Justice Commission. You've known ugly divorces where one side tries to pit the kids against the other? In this battle royale, ... |
Red Sox Pitcher John Lackey Divorce Is Final - TMZ.com
 TMZ.com | Red Sox Pitcher John Lackey Divorce Is Final TMZ.com As TMZ first reported, Lackey filed for divorce back in August while Krista was battling breast cancer. She underwent a double mastectomy last March. According to court records in Texas, the divorce was finalized on January 31. |
Bar Task Force to Study Issues Related to Indigent Pro Se Litigants - Texas Lawyer
Bar Task Force to Study Issues Related to Indigent Pro Se Litigants Texas Lawyer The State Bar of Texas has created a task force to study issues related to indigent pro se litigants after controversy reached a crescendo in mid-January over a Texas Supreme Court effort to make pro se divorce forms. On Jan. |
Texas 149 grass is winter variety - Longview News-Journal
Texas 149 grass is winter variety Longview News-Journal QUESTION: What kind of grass was planted along the Texas 149/Whiskey Bend remodeling project? I'd like to get some of it and put it in some of the bare areas of my yard. ANSWER: Don't get too excited. It's pretty, but it's temporary. |
For Wounded Vet, Love Pierces the Fog of War - Wall Street Journal
 Wall Street Journal | For Wounded Vet, Love Pierces the Fog of War Wall Street Journal By MICHAEL M. PHILLIPS Katie Brickman comforts her boyfriend, Ian Welch, at their home, in Dallas, Texas, this week. DALLAS—The night Katie Brickman met Ian Welch at the bar, she knew right away the Iraq war veteran was the man she wanted to marry. |